What Break a Razor?

Golly, nothing makes a man like a nice goatee.

A goatee is like... like...
It's like you took a drink from the hairy Pool of Man, but instead of sipping its water from the Cup of Girl you just lay down in the mud and stuck your face in it.
Or like all your anger squeezed out from the pores around your mouth, and then hardened into hair.
Or like your chin was so covered in the juice of the apple of original sin that dust and crap just started sticking to it.

I'm afraid that I don't have a goatee myself, but, then again, I've always thought of myself as more of a "boy."

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